Update: Mum in Hospital Day ??

So, here’s the deal – I haven’t written in ages for a very good reason. My mum is in hospital with an extremely critical case. She was admitted for colitis but has since ended up in the ICU in a comatose state. Finally, after my having to berate, browbeat and generally abuse the staff of York Central Hospital (my dad is playing good cop, I’m playing the bitchy faggot son from hell bad cop) she actually has a possible diagnosis.

From being ill with colitis to basic dementia to coma doesn’t come for no particular reason – but being that she’s immunocompromised due to the medication for her kidney transplant there’s a whole huge amount of things it could have been. I won’t even go into how fucking hard its been to see her like this, or how hard its been to try and maintain some sense of normalcy (as Dad said on Saturday – what normalcy? Until this is resolved there will BE no normalcy).

I spoke with the ICU about an hour and a half ago and it appears that a diagnosis is on the horizon. Its going to require a spinal tap to be conclusive (not to mention the MRI and the EEG they’ve already done, the biopsies, the CT scans etc) – but if it IS what they suspect it might be then its treatable. She is by far not out of the woods yet, and the mortality rate for her condition is rather high – but it can be resolved with medication (hopefully without long-term effects).

To everyone who has written with their words of support, encouragement, offers to talk about it, jokes to make me laugh in a very challenging time – I thank you so very much. She’s nearly there and needs to hold on for just a few more days – please keep doing whatever you’re doing, we’re really very nearly there.

Moving day (again…)

Alright, so I’ve moved my blog… again…

From the original LiveJournal site, to Blogger to having my own domain name (which I actually still own and may use in future projects) and hosting to now being on WordPress.com…. (The reason for WordPress was that they would let me import all my entries from my previous MT installation and Blogger would not – Blogger peeps, take note!)

I’m not totally giving up on Virtualzen, I just feel as though I have very little to say on it any more. Most of my time is now kept writing for Read.Cook.Eat. and Muffin-Top and I’m just not up to writing on here all that much any more. I’ll post now and again but stay tuned for more…

“High five!” meme

Found at The Unlimited Mood…

Five Items in My Freezer
Mini-pizza appetizers
Too many parmesan rinds to count
Chicken backs, necks, carcasses for stock
Pork and Onion hamburgers from Loblaws
Leftover Starbucks espresso

Five Items in My Closet
My duvet
A bag of books I don’t have anywhere else to put as yet
Clothes hamper
Too many jackets
Sebastian’s flight luggage

Five Items in My Car (don’t have a car… but I used to!)
CD’s
CD Holder
Lighter (I used to smoke)
Spare pack of ciggies
Mobile phone charger

Five Items in My Wallet
Like Christine, I’m changing this from Wallet to Backpack
Three Gourmet magazines
Two Moleskines
Mobile Phone
iPod
Glasses

Five Who are Now “It”
Anyone who feels like it!!

Actor’s Studio Question meme

Tagged by my pal Christine, I feel obliged (and quite happy) to go with a meme…

Actor’s Studio Questions

What is your favorite word?
“really”

What is your least favorite word?
“cock”

What turns you on creatively, spiritually, or emotionally?
the underdog, cleverness, minimalism

What turns you off?
smell of cigarettes (unless I’m drunk, then I want one), bad teeth, gnarly hands

What is your favorite curse word?
FUCK, FUCKING, C-WORD

What sound or noise do you love?
syncopated rhythms of any kind

What sound or noise do you hate?
a hacking, chest heaving cough

What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
food stylist

What profession would you not like to do?
bikini waxer (yuck!)

If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
Yes, Eric, love IS the right path – those right-wing fag and dyke haters? They’re the ones going downtown – c’mon in! The party’s just started!

I tag the following: Cammie, Terry, Sage and Duane

I know, I know…

Its been ages since I wrote here – but I’ve been writing on ReadCookEat and just started writing with Christine and a host of others on Muffintop, a new food blog. I’m also hoping to find out soon about writing for The Kitchen, a division of Apartment Therapy (if you’d like to support my quest, feel free to cross your fingers – I’d ask for testimonials but I don’t want to overwhelm the editors!).

I’m starting down a very interesting new career path that seems to be getting a LOT of support from everyone I talk to. Its going to be a period of transition over the next two years or so (by my estimation anyway – as anyone who knows me well knows that things tend to go much more quickly for me than I originally anticipate) and although I’m keeping some of it very close to my chest its not exactly a secret. I’m currently on the verge of making an interim career move, please stand by for more details. (

Anyway, I’ve decided I’m going to be giving up Virtualzen.net this year – I might renew the domain name to keep around for a while but I’m not going to be blogging here much after September. Its time for a change. I’ve got a new blogging project underway and no, its not ReadCookEat. Its a new venture that’s hopefully going to become a larger part of my life as time goes by.

Not much to add right now – kinda busy with normal work, the boyfriend and I are going very strong (though, I will blog about my very strange weekend we just had – gimme a day or two…) and enjoying the summer (although its pissing down rain today which is making me less than happy).

Hope everyone is very well!!!!

Rye High all over again – Gay rights under attack (again…)

Welcome to convocation at Ryerson University, where yesterday’s awarding of degrees in the faculties of engineering, architecture and science offered a snapshot of the polarized gay marriage debate.

At the heart of it all was Margaret Somerville, a diminutive Montreal ethicist and outspoken opponent of same-sex marriage who has stirred up big controversy as the recipient of Ryerson’s newest honorary doctorate.

I can’t believe they went ahead and did this. Talk about speaking out of both sides of your mouth!

“Make no mistake of it, there are a lot of people in our community that are fundamentally opposed to or against what professor Somerville says,” Ryerson president Sheldon Levy, including himself among those critics, told reporters at a news conference with her after the ceremony. “At the same time, she has every right to say it.”

Yes, she does have that right. Kinda. If she used one word stronger than she has used in the past could she be considered guilty of spreading hate (which I believe is a felony in this country)? The kind that those whackos in the US Bible Belt try to spread here once in a while? I, for one, will never return to Ryerson and am completely ashamed that such an organization that has pulled itself up from the monicker of “Rye High” to be one of the more esteemed universities in Canada should even have considered giving her this honour. And at graduation yet. For which there were certainly a number of gay graduates who may or may not be partnered. Who actually PAID for thier degrees. Full price. Not honourary. Like some anti-gay activists.

Does she have the right to say these things about gay marriage? Yes. Do they have to honour her with an F’ing honourary doctorate? NO. BIG FAT FUCKING NO. Shame on you, Rye High, for being so blind to the community you serve and the students you abandoned.

Wayne McKenna, 44, certainly thinks the existing law allowing same-sex marriage should be overturned. He wore a devil mask and pushed a baby stroller holding a white coffin with a pitchfork through the middle and “R.I.P. Children’s Rights, Family Values, Future Generation” written down the side.

“What you want to do in the privacy of your house or bedroom is your business,” said McKenna, who added that he and his two similarly attired colleagues represented concerned Canadian parents.

“But when you start inflicting your rights on me and you start upsetting the natural order of things, that’s wrong.” Somerville, who insists her views are not religious or political in nature, believes same-sex marriage is wrong because marriage is fundamentally about creating children and they deserve — and need — both a biological mother and father.

Fuck you, Wayne McKenna. Since when has any right given to a gay person been INFLICTED upon you? What part of “if you’re not gay or lesbian these have NOTHING to fucking DO with you?” do you not get? This IS the natural order of things – your supposed “morality” has no bearing on me, has nothing to do with my life – so stop INFLICTING your HATRED and pointless vitriol on ME! At least have the courage of your “convictions” to stand there with your face exposed instead of hiding away behind something that we, as proud gay men and women no longer need to hide behind. Come out of your bigoted closet so we can see just what kind of pathetic, scared little man you are.

And for you, Ms. Somerville, just because we’re gay doesn’t mean that we don’t have children from biological mothers and fathers – do you know something about reproduction I don’t? Cause I know a TON of gay couples who would love to know your secret so that they too can have children without having to suffer through the government’s tortuous adoption process. Yes, children deserve two parents – yes, parents deserve the love and support of a partner when raising a child – but if that were LAW? Then one would never be able to divorce, one could potentially be thrown in jail for placing that relationship in jeopardy by cheating on one’s spouse – and we wouldn’t have 16 year olds having children on their own and becoming burdens upon the state – the state to which I pay taxes, including that for YOUR children to go to school.

In other words, to people like the Dishonourable Stephen Harper, Ms. Somerville and Mr/Mrs. Wayne McKenna (who apparently is into Hallowe’en drag and baby carriages for anyone into that kind of thing); shut up and leave us the fuck alone, give us our goddamn rights that we fully and completely pay for – or reduce my taxes by 50% for the benefits that my partner and I will never be able to use. Then you’ll have the RIGHT to say whatever the hell you want.

Quotes taken from The Toronto Star, June 20, 2006

New link to Read. Cook. Eat.

I’ve added the link to my new blog on the righthand side, just under my profile. Its all about cooking, eating, cookbooks and cookware – check it out!

Read. Cook. Eat.

Now I’m REALLY depressed…

I’m sat at home on a Saturday night with nothing much more than a computer and a glass of Black Cherry Vanilla Diet Coke to keep me company… S is off working tonight (he’s on his third day of a four day rotation) and won’t be home till like 2am. So, I’m surfing around and I’m thinking of this guy that I went to high school with that I thought I saw one day when I was on the streetcar. Google him just for kicks. Yeah, shouldna done that.

Not only does he come up straight away, I find out that he has an MBA from a MAJOR US university, completed graduate business studies in Spain, started his own company and ended up being named young entrepreneur of the year last year – all for starting a new business that has gone like gangbusters over the past two years. He’s married, has two kids, yada yada yada. The thing is that this is the guy who needed MY help during school, didn’t do terribly well – but had the determination and fortitude to stick to something.

I wonder where I might have been had I not taken all these twists and turns in my life. Had I managed to stay a true and solid course instead of following my dreams and my heart? Would I have been so successful? Am I successful? What measure success?

I should know better than to ask such questions…

P.S. I’m writing on S’s Microsoft keyboard – I hate this freakin’ thing. Why the hell can’t PC manufacturers figure our that Mac keyboards are so superior as to be nearly elite and manage to create one that works just like it?? Anyway, I’m just in a pissy mood. Look away and I’ll be fine by the time you get back.

P.P.S. The thing I was meant to find out about has been put on hold last week due to someone having been away on holiday. I’m hoping that I can get some action moving on that front on Monday.

Just a little bit longer…

I have a little interesting development that cropped up today that I’m just busting about. All I can say is that the next week to 10 days is going to be quite interesting. I promise I’ll reveal all as soon as I can be reasonably sure that I’m not going to shoot myself in the foot over this one.

If you care for me at all, please keep fingers crossed, good luck charms around and positive vibes coming – we’re talking about a VERY positive HUGE change possibility for me – the kind that would set me and S up for a good while if it should come to pass.

Love to you all…

UPDATE: I just spoke with a dear friend about the news which I cannot speak of just yet. She’s in complete agreement that this could be a tremendous move. We also pieced together the rest of the missing links and lets just say this – if this comes to pass it will be as tremendous a thing for me as meeting and falling in love with Sebas. Yes, its that important and special…

P.S. I’m starting a new blog over at readcookeat.blogspot.com – just started but will eventually take over this one…

You simply need to read this…

My pal Terry has had a bit of a rough go of things lately – and he’s pulling through admirably. His posting for today was so incredibly inspiring, so full of hope that I feel as though I should reprint it here… I’m not going to do that – more cause I want you to go visit his site if you haven’t already. The link to the entry is here - go read it…

P.S. He’s also very inspiring cause he’s lost a TON of weight, ended a less than fulfilling relationship, kicks ass generally and is incredibly open and honest. You rock Terry and I can’t wait to meet you when you come to Toronto to visit.